My Son Kyle

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My Son Kyle; Answered Prayer!!!
Topic Started: Jan 10 2008, 11:11 AM (333 Views)
Liz Tracy	Jan 10 2008, 11:11 AM Post #1
Member Posts: 22 Group: Members Member #107 Joined: January 13, 2006	Dear Saints, Back in November of '06, I asked for prayer on this forum for my son Kyle. He was having severe panic attacks. (We are the family who run a ministry with after school Bible Clubs in public schools here in Toledo Ohio) You all reached out to me in love with encouraging posts and really helped me through that difficult time. I am so grateful and wanted to share with you the glorious recovery and the marvelous work God has done in Kyle's life. Not only is Kyle completely cured but he has totally rededicated his life to the Lord and is on fire for Jesus! He is 22 now and has gotten involved with a fantastic group of young adults who love the Lord. He has left his old life behind and is walking with the Lord. Last Sunday night he was baptized at a youth revival here in our town. PRAISE GOD!! I am overflowing with gratitude to our wonderful Savior for the glorious work he has accomplished. I just want to encourage any parent out there to never give up and never stop praying. We serve a mighty God!! Thanks again for being there when I needed you! Thanks for this great forum! Love in Christ, Liz Tracy



julieann	Jan 10 2008, 07:12 PM Post #2
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	Praise God Liz! Thank you so much for coming here to update us on what God has done in Kyle's life. I am so happy for you and your family! Keep giving Kyle kisses of love..... whether he succeeds or fails... cause that's what our heavenly Father showers on us. God has his kid's backs, right or wrong. He is on our side. He will always fight for us. The enemy, I won't even mention his name, has been defeated. Our DAD... always prays for us, always loves us, always protects us, always defends us, always sides with his kids! :amen :pray: AMEN! Hallelujah!



belinda	Jan 10 2008, 08:12 PM Post #3
Advanced Member Posts: 1,519 Group: Members Member #50 Joined: November 4, 2005	Praise God! That is great news Liz. Will continue to pray for you and your family. :amen
	John 3:16 For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life....... Amen, Come Lord Jesus!


julieann	Jan 10 2008, 08:17 PM Post #4
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	Parents everywhere want to hear their son's and daughter's proclaim.... My Mother/Father is the smile you can count on. The good-night kiss you couldn't sleep without, the look that meant "don't even think about it." Mother/Father is the hand that cooled your hot forehead, the arm around your shoulders when you needed consoling, and the encouraging nod that said, "I believe in you!" Mother/Father is the voice on the phone that still makes you feel better when nothing else can, the hug that welcomes you home, the proud smile that lets you know that you are loved, so very loved. In which they can proclaim.... No son or daughter is luckier than I, because I have the greatest Mother/Father in the world. ps- this was copied from a card that I received from my older son Keith for my birthday, after my younger son Brian died. Please don't make the same mistake I made.... I praised Keith for his GOOD behavior, although me and my husband never compared Brian's behavior to Keith's overtly, Brian perceived the differences. He would tell me... "I'm just a piece of shit." (please excuse my bluntness). He would say of his brother Keith, in comparison to himself...."He is the perfect son!" Oh my God! I live day to day with these memories... I can hardly breathe.... Please, as a mother who lost a kid to rebellion, depression, self -deprecation and ultimately succumbed to over-dosing on drugs and died at the tender age of 19.... I can tell you as a mother and from personal experience... The kid who fights you the hardest. The kid who is anathema. The kid who says they hate your guts, the kid you raised and now think you do not know, the kid who is the most unlovable....who has become rebellious against you and the God you taught him about, is the kid who needs your utmost love, care and protection the MOST. This is the kid who needs your unconditional love the most. In this world, we're conditioned to rear and to love the most desirable people... They are supposed to be the most beautiful, successful, accomplished, intelligent, and desirable among men. We want them to receivethe accolades and the applause of men, but this is deceitful according to God's Word. Oh Christians! Moreover, parents...do not succumb to this worldly deception, that seeks our and our children's destruction. May The Lord... our God, Who is worthy of our praise forever, The Most High God over all the earth, have mercy on us and on our children in these last days.



Liz Tracy	Jan 10 2008, 09:32 PM Post #5
Member Posts: 22 Group: Members Member #107 Joined: January 13, 2006	Once again Julieann I am so moved by your openess and willingness to share your heart about your tragedy. You gave me good advice when Kyle was struggling and I never forgot what you said about Kyle's need for affirmation. Kyle also has an older brother who is the first born and a super achiever (college graduate and now a stock broker at Merrill Lynch). Kyle failed in Junior college because of the choices he was making back then. I know he always felt compared to his successful brother which added to the problems he was having. But dear sister, please know that the Lord used your tragedy in my life as I became even more aware of Kyle's need for affirmation and acceptance during those dark times. Thank you so much. God is using you and I know He will continue to use you as you minsiter to more Moms who find themselves in the shoes you wore when you lost your precious Brian. I am praying for you dear Sis and want you to know that my heart goes out to you in your loss. I know it is a loss that a Mom can never fully recover from, but I also know firsthand that God is using you! I hope it encourages you to know that you are helping others....and perhaps even saved a life. Be blessed and encouraged today, Your sister in Christ, Liz



julieann	Jan 11 2008, 02:04 PM Post #6
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	My dear Liz, Your testimony moved me so much. As I read it I just sobbed and sobbed... Oftentimes, I feel like I'm not able to do anything for the Lord, so your testimony greatly encouraged me. And you saying that our experience possibly saved Kyle's life was almost too much for me to take in. It was so powerful and at the same time so humbling to see that God is using Brian's life and death to save others. His death was not in vain. God always has a greater purpose. He always turns what satan meant for evil into good. The enemy succeeded in taking Brian's life. But God is the one who remains triumphant, for he has conquered sin and death. Brian is in heaven with God. The enemy can't hurt Brian anymore. And God has the last laugh because Brian's death is saving other kids who will go on and advance the kingdom of God. The enemy wanted to take Kyle's life and prevent his ministry, but God wouldn't allow it. He brought us together... me and you sis to thwart the tactics the enemy was using against Kyle and gave us a strategy in how to overcome him. God is worthy of all our praise. He works all things together for our good. I love him and I love you and your family Liz. I can't wait to see you all in heaven and we can rejoice together and marvel at all the great things God has done for us. I can't wait for you to meet my son Liz. Oh what a glorious day that will be!



julieann	Jan 11 2008, 02:58 PM Post #7
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	Ps- thank you so much for your prayers Liz. :pray: We need them!



Liz Tracy	Jan 11 2008, 08:28 PM Post #8
Member Posts: 22 Group: Members Member #107 Joined: January 13, 2006	Thanks Julianne! I can't wait until we are all in glory rejoicing together! It's wonderful that Brian was saved. Just think of all the poor Moms who lose kids who aren't. They don't have the peace of knowing they will see them again. How sad. . . I'm praying that the Lord brings Moms into your life who need to hear your testimony. It is powerful and you have a lot of wisdom to share that could help them. So many times we Christian parents have it all wrong. We think we have to be the enforcer of righteousness and we subtly demand perfection from our kids. I say subtly because we don't even realize that's what we are communicating to them. Kids are so perceptive and they pick up on so much. One of the things that has been a negative in our kids lives has been the hypocrisy they've seen in Christian leaders, not in churches, but in the Christian school they attended. Sometimes I wonder if I had it to do over if I would have opted for a Christian school. . .so many of the kids didn't make a very good transition to the real world. They end up full of bitterness. Kyle's story is very special. In fact, the church that hosted the revival he attended wants to videotape his story to use at the next event. If they do I will be sure to give you the link to watch it. If you are interested, you can watch the girl's testimony they showed the night Kyle responded. Her story is a lot like Kyle's, she also suffered from panic attacks, depression, etc. Here's the link: Missy's Story In fact, she has become a close friend of Kyle's because their testimonies are so similar. (I forgot to mention that the whole thing the Lord used to get Kyle's attention was that his girlfriend of over 3 years suddenly left him for another guy. He was devastated. We're were so worried about him! It was a terrible, terrible dark time. That's what drove him to church that night and he hasn't looked back! Praise God!) Thanks again for the encouragement! It's so wonderful to have a place a refuge to go and to share with Believers who aren't afraid to admit their struggles. We're all in this together - amen? Let me know what you think of Missy's story. Liz



julieann	Jan 12 2008, 09:48 PM Post #9
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	Dear Liz, I have much to share with you and I want to respond to your letter, I just need more time to think. I did see Missy's story and it affected me in so many ways. I think this is why I need more time before I respond. I was overwhelmed with emotions. I needed time to confer with the Lord about all these things. Please know, that I am thinking about all the things you said, and about Missy's testimony. I will talk to you soon, after I get all my feelings and thoughts together. Or rather, when I understand all my thoughts and feelings about the subjects we're talking about. lol I need time to process all of this. Thanks for understanding. love jules



julieann	Jan 18 2008, 02:18 PM Post #10
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	Quote: We think we have to be the enforcer of righteousness and we subtly demand perfection from our kids. I say subtly because we don't even realize that's what we are communicating to them. Kids are so perceptive and they pick up on so much. One of the things that has been a negative in our kids lives has been the hypocrisy they've seen in Christian leaders, not in churches, but in the Christian school they attended. Sometimes I wonder if I had it to do over if I would have opted for a Christian school. . .so many of the kids didn't make a very good transition to the real world. They end up full of bitterness. I think we demand perfect behavior for three reasons. One, we want the best for our kids. We want them to do well in life and flourish and be accepted by society as a whole. Two, we want to LOOK GOOD. We feel our kids behavior is a reflection on us and it makes US look BAD. So when they fail, (we feel we've failed) we show them our disappointment in many ways, ie. punishment, with-holding affection, showing anger, or we try and make them feel guilty for hurting us. And three, we make the mistake of demanding perfection from our kids because we expect it from ourselves. We beat ourselves up when we fail, so if our kids don't beat themselves up when they fail, we feel it's necessary to do it for them. That's sounds really bad doesn't it? Makes me heartsick thinking about this now, realizing the guilt trips I put on Brian. I remember when I was first saved how elated and grateful I felt knowing that God wiped my sins away. I felt such relief knowing that Jesus died on the cross for MY SINS and I didn't have to strive anymore to gain his approval. All I could do was cry..."Thank you Jesus", Thank you Jesus!" I knew when he filled me with his Holy Spirit that day I was clean. It was the beginning of a wonderful, affectionate, and loving relationship. Before that I was afraid of Him. I was raised catholic, so the fear of God was ingrained in me. Not that fearing God is wrong, it's good as long as it's a respectful fear. As I "grew" in the Lord.... attending a bible preaching church, countless bible studies, and retreats, I forgot from whence I came from... totally helpless to hit the mark or gain God's acceptance to trying to gain his approval by works! I tried so hard to obey every word in the bible and whenever I failed, I thought God was disappointed in me. And ya know the church helped fuel this belief. Many Christians make this doctrinal error (I know I did). We demand perfection from each other, and we judge each other harshly whenever we fall short. We forget that it was Christ's shed blood on the cross that saved us and NOTHING else. Instead, we pridefully TRY and make ourselves WORTHY of his love and approval. My kids attended Christian school thru 2nd and 4th grades. The school closed and my husband didn't want to pay more for another Christian school. I agonized over this, until a good friend of mine said that God was in control and that I needed to obey/respect my husband's wishes. I blamed the public schools for Brian's downfall. I blamed myself. I blamed my husband. It's natural to want to blame someone, or something to make sense of what went wrong. But it doesn't fix or change anything. It' wasn't until after Brian died that I realized just how sovereign God is over our lives. What we call mistakes are really not mistakes at all. God knows every detail of our lives from beginning to end. He is never surprised when we fail. God uses our failures and mistakes to teach us and to bring himself glory. Nothing happens to us by accident or outside of his will. And we forget that our kids have to go thrugh their own trials and tribulations just like us. We naturally want to protect them from pain and heartache. Instead of trying to prevent or rescue them from their trials, we need to support them through it...with understanding, patience and love. They don't need berating or lectures. They need us to be open and honest about our own failures and share with them the struggles and trials that we've gone through and assure them that eveything will be okay. That we'll be there for them and help them and love them no matter what. Quote: Her story is a lot like Kyle's, she also suffered from panic attacks, depression, etc. Here's the link: Missy's Story In fact, she has become a close friend of Kyle's because their testimonies are so similar. (I forgot to mention that the whole thing the Lord used to get Kyle's attention was that his girlfriend of over 3 years suddenly left him for another guy. He was devastated. We're were so worried about him! It was a terrible, terrible dark time. That's what drove him to church that night and he hasn't looked back! I saw Missy's story. That's one of the reasons I couldn't respond to your letter right away. It opened up alot of memories and emotions in me. Brian had the same experience as Missy. One time when he overdosed, he made it to my sister's house and screamed for her to call 911. He was crying and telling my sister he was going to hell if he died. Although, I understand the fear Missy and Brian had and how real it was to them, it wasn't TRUE! They related their fear of ending up in HELL based on their knowledge and understanding of salvation. We and the church TAUGHT them that they will get to HEAVEN by their WORKS! We say we believe that Jesus died on the cross to pay for our sins, yet TEACH something else. We've added works to the cross. Oh, I'm heartsick. I taught this to my kids and I let others teach them the same. It grieves me so.... I should've have been protecting them from this lie, but sadly, I believed it myself. I can see how this error leads to panic attacks, fear, depression, and suicide. I've experienced all these myself. Knowing the truth... that you're loved and totally accepted by God, even when you fail, protects us from the things aforementioned. We need to constantly remind ourselves and our kids that we are loved and totally accepted by God. Some of us need to do this on a daily basis. Lastly, on the subject of our kids having intimate relationships and how it adversely effects them. Brian had two relationships with girls that he loved and wanted to marry. One at the age of 16 and one at the age of 18. His first relationship with Chloe led to many suicidal attempts. We tried many times to break them up, forbidding them to see each other etc. but were unsuccessful. They eventually broke up after Chloe went off to college in another state. We were so relieved until he met Nikki. Then after about 6 months, the nightmare started all over again. Brian killed himself 2 months short of their anniversary date. They had plans...they wanted to get married and have four kids. Brian had just started back at school to get his GED. He only made it to two classes before he died. Nikki was working and attending school. She started to gain more confidence and wanted more independence from Brian's controlling behavior. He saw this as a threat. He thought he would lose her. He was fighting to maintain control of the relationship and when he realized he was losing his influence and control over her, he snapped. He threatened to kill himself if she didn't meet him that fateful night. He had threatened her with that many times before. Although she was fearful, she believed he wouldn't do it, but he did. She was devasted as were we. She still comes here and calls us. We treat her like a daughter. I believe God forbids sex before marriage because he knows the intimacy two people share in that physical act will make them "one" as he said promised in Genesis. It binds the man and woman together into a covenant relationship. It's not just a physical and emotional bond, but a "spiritual one." Without the commitment of marriage, the couple has no assurance that the other will stay forever and not leave them. No one wants to be used or taken advantage of...we all want to be loved and cherished. Without a commitment, one is vulnerable to rejection. Rejection leads to all types of pain and hurt. This is hard enough for adults to deal with let alone teenagers who are far more vulnerable during a break up. They don't have the coping skills needed to heal and move on after a break up. They see it as the end of the world. oh Liz, I'm emotionally spent. I didn't set out to write such a long letter, but I knew that if I were willing to be honest (and I wanted to be and prayed and asked God to help me to be) with my feelings it might turn out to be a long letter. It helps me be honest with myself and I hope my honesty helps others. I think after reading this you'll understand why it took me so long to write you back. Please pray for me and my family Liz. And again thank you for your love and support. Shower your kids with Kisses and hugs of Love and Don't let go first! :lol:



julieann	Feb 21 2008, 06:10 PM Post #11
Advanced Member Posts: 747 Group: Members Member #53 Joined: November 4, 2005	I felt a conviction to correct what I said in an earlier post about having a reverent fear of the Lord. Of course we should all have a reverent fear of God, but we should also have a "HOLY FEAR" OF GOD.



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